Why Exactly Kurt Hummel is Afraid of Vampires
by AngelisIgniRelucent
Summary: "Oh, baby, do we have to?" you whine, tugging on Blaine's sleeve as he heads over to slot the DVD into the machine. "Come on, it'll be fun!" he grins.


**Oh, oh, guess who prompted this one? YOU GUESSED IT! The fantastic Patricia Sage :D disclaimer: I don't own**

"Oh, baby, do we have to?" you whine, tugging on Blaine's sleeve as he heads over to slot the DVD into the machine.  
>"Come on, it'll be fun!" he grins, but his expression changes when he sees the pout on your face. He turns on his puppy-dog eyes full force. "Please?" he asks, his voice small, and, dammit, how can you say no to that?<br>"_Fine_," you acquiesce reluctantly, "but you don't get any snuggles because you unfairly exploited the effect that your eyes have on me. So Finn has to watch it with us. And if you try anything, he'll kill you," you say with a smirk. Oddly enough, he doesn't seem perturbed by this at all, shooting you a smile and a 'go ahead, honey'. You narrow your eyes at him for a second, but brush it off – opting to call for Finn and telling him to bring some snacks from the kitchen instead.

He shuffles in sleepily, clutching two bowls full of Crunchy Nut Clusters and crunching loudly.  
>"Wha- we wa-ching?" he mumbles around his mouthful.<br>"Oh, I don't know, some _vampire movie_," you snark, making sure Blaine doesn't miss the glare you send his way. He just winks at you, sidling closer and snuggling into your side.  
>"Hey, now, none of that!" Finn says, aghast. "I can't … you can't … he's my baby brother – can you, like, not …"<br>"Honestly, Blaine!" you mock-chide, "Not in front of Finn!" He just his rolls his eyes adorably, squashing himself over to the opposite end of the sofa so he's not making any contact with you at all. "Go on then, start it already! If we've got to watch it then we may as well get it over with!"

As the opening sequence plays, you find yourself wincing as the unsuspecting family meets a bloody end, cringing into the cushions as the gore splats the wall and a scream echoes around the room. Glancing over at Blaine, you catch him looking away from you too-suddenly, a slight smile gracing his features. You don't say anything, just reach across the sofa to slip your hand into his. His smile grows a little wider as he rubs soothing circles into your palm with his thumb and you sigh with relief as the screen switches to a less gruesome scene.

The next spree of attacks has you cowering against the arm of the sofa, burying your face in your arm as a chunk of the guy's neck gets ripped out, and you don't even note Blaine's smug grin as you allow him to pry your death grip off his hand so he can pull you into a hug. You're too busy trying to stop yourself from shaking to pay attention to his slight chuckle, and you don't see the way his eyes are shining with mirth from where you're position, face burrowed into his neck.

You peek out occasionally to try and stick with the plot, only to dive back as the ever-growing army of vampires seems to massacre literally everybody. Blaine just squeezes you, whispering in your ear and rubbing your back to soothe you as you literally whimper in fear.

"It's okay, babe, it's finished now," he croons, raising your head and placing alight kiss on your nose. You just blink at him, wide-eyed and pale.  
>"It's … over?" you whisper. He nods. "Oh, thank <em>god<em>!" you cry, throwing your arms around him. You hold him tight for a moment, gleaning every last drop of his comforting presence, before proceeding to smack his back with both hands. "Don't." _Smack _"You." _Smack _"_Ever._" _Big smack_ "Do that to me again." _Lots of smacks._ He writhes in your grip, trying to escape your wrath, but he's laughing so hard that he can't coordinate his limbs enough to disengage you. Inevitably, he turns to tickling, making you into a pliable mess, squirming under his more-than-capable hands. "No … I'm sorry … please … stop …" you manage to gasp out between giggles, but then, somehow, he's on top of you and his golden eyes are burning into yours.

"Stop what?" he asks, his voice low and husky. He places one hand on either side of your head and lowers himself down, pressing one kiss to your lips then pulling away. You whine at the loss, straining your neck up to try and capture his lips again, but he pulls up, teasing you.  
>"Heyyy," you gripe, "come back here, you," and he obliges, but only for a moment, pulling his head back again.<br>"So, what have we learned today, Kurt?" he says, putting on his best school-teacher voice.  
>"That I don't like horror movies and you're never allowed to pick the film again unless it's Disney, because I like Disney. And can you please kiss me now?"<br>"Oh. Well it seems you missed the entire point of the lesson, Mr Hummel. Except the bit about Disney movies – I approve of that. As for the rest of it … I guess we'll just have to punish you …" His voice slips into a growl at that point, and you couldn't have stopped the needy little sound that chokes its way out of your throat if you'd tried.

"I … I need … _Blaine!_" you cry, because he's brushing his hips gently over yours, but not nearly hard enough to provide any kind of friction. And you guess it's his fault for being so damn _distracting _that your brain seems to have turned to mush and that you are completely oblivious to the _other person in the room_ who had, up until that point, been completely oblivious to you too. But evidently, he saw now as an opportune moment to remove his head from where it was buried between the back of the couch and a cushion.

"Woah! Guys! Seriously! What the hell!" and Blaine's off you quicker than you could even think 'shotgun'. You, on the other hand, seemingly having lost all neurological function, just lie there, gasping. "Like, what? I only just figured the film had finished, because it was, like, scary as shit, dude! And then you guys are totally going at it on the couch! I know I'm, like, cool with you guys being gay and all, but you can't just … I mean …"

"Finn!" you yell, finally having got your breath back enough to cut through his tirade. He stops sheepishly, evidently in awe of what you're sure is one of your most impressive bitch-faces to date. "You're going to forget you saw this, okay? And if you even _consider _telling my dad, just remember: 'The Time When You And Rachel Were Playing Dress-Up'. That is all I have to say. So now Blaine and I are going down to my room." And with that, you get up and grab Blaine's wrist in one fluid motion, dragging him towards your stairs. You don't even bother to look round at Finn's reaction – you know he won't say anything – so you hurry in slamming the door behind the two of you and locking it.

"So, about that punishment …"

**Sorry about that ending … I could've gone on, but I'm too distracted byu the DARREN CRISS SEX RIOT HAPPENING ON THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW OH MY GOD OH MY GOD ASDFGHJKL! *ahem* sorry. But if you haven't seen all those beach pics of him … WRITE YOUR WILL BEFORE YOU DO.  
>Anyway, thoughts?<br>xx**


End file.
